Reality Sets In: Part 15

Before I continue our story as Faith was leaving Canada to return to her work with 3,900 orphans in Zambia...

I'm sitting in Heathrow. It's monsoon-like outside. This sort of "dampened" (pardon the pun) our plans to kill our 12 hour layover with some sightseeing as we waited for our flight to Jo-Burg. Regardless, the kids have been great. Codie is now talking about giving up becoming a truck driver to become a pilot (the friendly skies will never be the same again!)

And as I write this I'm hoping that my computer won't turn into "Jaws" again. Let me explain. Things have been crazy-busy over the last few weeks as final preparations were being made to leave. I ended up in Florida while Mur and the kids got everything ready to leave.

Hey wait...I know what you are thinking - what a supportive husband, leaving Mur to do all the work. Actually, I was taking a tropical agriculture course at ECHO (Educational Concerns for Hunger Organization). Everyone thought (especially me) that it would be a good thing for me, as Faith's Orphan Fund's farm development project manager, to have at least a basic understanding of agriculture.

With all that was happening, I hadn't been able to blog. So 3 days ago in the Fort Myers airport I decided to catch up on the blog while on a 1 1/2 hour weather delay. Then reality set in. I wrote about 3 paragraphs and then my computer decided to dump everything.

Undeterred, and wanting to show how much patience I had learned over the last 3 years, I began again. This time I meticulously saved each paragraph. But then, just like in the movie "Jaws" without warning, my computer devoured everything. Try as I might, it was lost.

This time I had to admit defeat! So here I sit, 3 days later, with 2 hours before leaving on the second leg of our journey hoping, praying my computer will cooperate.

So far so good. I'll try to post this and continue "Reality Sets In: Part 15" next time (And if it doesn't post maybe you can check your in-box).

Ready, Set, Go! Part 14

One of the highlights of Faith's time in Canada was when I (Brian) had the opportunity to share with Faith and Doraine at our church, Wilmot Centre. Our Church family had stood with us through the ups and downs of the previous 3 years. So it was great to share with them about Faith's Orphan Fund (FOF) and have them meet Faith. Their response was overwhelming.

And as I shared that Sunday morning, I felt a part of FOF for the first time.

In the weeks before Faith returned to Zambia, we began to work out my responsibilities as FOF's Farm Development Project Manager. Those who know me, know I like a challenge, but as I began to understand the expectations of FOF I was overwhelmed by the responsibilities (so overwhelmed I cried). I'm not sure what I expected in serving in Africa, but nothing had prepared me for this.

Again, Mur and friends encouraged me. They continued to help me to focus on this fact: The Lord had directed our steps and He would provide the wisdom and strength needed for each day. With this, we had one last meeting with Faith and the FOF Canada Board, before she left.

During the meeting we discussed our need for housing, household furnishings and a vehicle for the 8 of us. FOF had none of these things as they had never sent anyone to work with Faith for one year. As the discussion continued we thought we would be asked to raise the money for these things. So when the Board decided to pay to have a house built for us we were amazed. And we agreed that we would raise $25,000 for a vehicle and household furnishings. Doing this would allow FOF to send others after us, without having them raise these additional funds.

It was now early June. Our excitement quickly became infectious as we shared with family and friends. But with only 3 months before we were to leave the reality of preparing to serve with FOF began to set in. If you have never had to prepare for a trip of this nature with 6 kids it's hard to believe all that needed to be done (we had no idea!).

We knew that the biggest challenge would be around our two homes. We had planned to finish our main residence and sell it. This would put us in a position to be debt and mortgage free on our second home before leaving. Our daughter, Jess and her 2 kids, had agreed to move in for a year to look after things for us. It seemed like a great plan.

So as we entered the final months of preparation, we had a sense that we were standing at the starting line of the most important race of our lives. And as the adrenalin and excitement coursed through our bodies we could almost hear the announcer say, "Ready, Set, Go!"

Continued in Part 15: Reality Sets In

Faith Comes To Town: Part 13

One of the things I like about Jesus is how he uses double meanings in his parables. This method of teaching invites those interested to follow him and enter into a dialogue with him. For Jesus teaching was about establishing relationships, a wandering community where the truth of the Kingdom of God could be discovered - just like one who seeks a pearl of high value - as they served one another.

And so it is with this blog: "Faith Comes To Town." During this past Spring, as we continued to investigate the possibility of serving with Faith's Orphan Fund (FOF), our faith was being renewed. But also we learned that FOF's founder, Faith Liyena, was scheduled to visit Canada in late May.

The months before her visit was another time of waiting. We continued to build Christian community with a few friends, fostering and renovating. We were excited that FOF Canada had conditionally approved our going to serve in Zambia, but Faith would need to give her final approval. Without Faith's approval we would have to begin the search for a new agency (something we were not looking forward to). But then a "feeling" began to emerge.

Ever had one of those "feelings?" You know, something that seems to infiltrate your thoughts and dreams. It doesn't seem to make sense. It's not based in anything concrete. Some call it a premonition. Others intuition. Still others a word of knowledge given by the Holy Spirit. Well regardless of its source, I (Brian) began to have a sense that something was hindering Faith's approval. And all we could do was pray and wait for Faith to come to town.

Finally, Faith arrived. We met her briefly as she and Doraine (FOF Canada's secretary) shared about the work of FOF at the Christian Gleaners where we volunteer. As Mur and Faith spoke together, they seemed to share a common interest and bond regarding the unfortunate situation facing many of the children, both here and in Africa.

The following week, we, along with Faith and Doraine, had the opportunity to make a joint presentation at FACS. This meeting was instrumental in FACS's continuing confidence in sending our family to serve in Zambia. We were so pleased to have Faith there to answer any lingering concerns. We left this meeting knowing we had the full support of FACS.

Then, over lunch, an amazing thing happened. I asked Faith if she had any concerns about our coming (I asked the question to deal with my "feeling" knowing that Faith may not want to answer the question directly - It's the African way to not want to offend). But to my surprise Faith answered that she had had some concerns, initially.

She shared that when she heard of us wanting to come, she did not really want "Whites" (her words) coming to help. But something had happened to change her mind. Faith told us that when she first spoke to Mur at the Gleaners that she realized that Mur shared the same heart for the vulnerable children of the world as she did. And it was in that moment that Faith knew that we were the right people to come and work with her and her team.

So we left that lunch, marvelling at the way the Lord had directed not only our steps, but Faith's as well. And in that moment when Faith came to town, we realized our faith had come also.

Continued in Part 14: Ready, Set, Go!

A Perfect Fit? Part 12

As winter continued the silence was almost deafening. We tried to wait patiently to hear from Doraine of Faith's Orphan Fund (FOF). Then in late January Doraine responded to an email. She had just returned from oversees and indicated that FOF needed a farm manager. A farm manager???? You've got to be kidding!

Both Mur and I (Brian) have had a lot of experiences but not in agriculture. The only farm experience was the summers Mur spent at her aunt's and uncle's farm in Neudorf, Saskatchewan, as a child. My initial reaction was to say, "no" and begin the search for another agency. But for some reason (the Spirit of the Lord directing our steps?) I decided to forward the email to a good friend, Chester, who is an agriculturalist serving in Africa for Crossroads.

I'll always remember Chester's response encouraging us to follow through with the opportunity. He even offered to mentor us both here and in Africa! Additionally, we thought of what Mark Crocker (our trainer through the Pentecostal Assemblies of Canada - Medium Term Mission program) had challenged us with.

During one session, Mark had asked us what we would do if we were in Africa serving in the area of our job description and giftedness, and then suddenly the agency needed us to do something else. He explained that it is not unusual to be asked to do something that we had not agreed to and was possibly outside our experience. I also remembered Miss Lageer, my mission's teacher atEmmanuel Bible College, telling us that, "flexibility," was one of the greatest things that a person serving in another culture needed.

So Mur and I had a "what if" discussion. What if we had been serving in Zambia and the agency needed a farm manager. And what if they approached us to fill this need. We talked about the many times we had been asked by FACS to serve kids with needs that we thought were beyond us. We knew that if asked, we would do our best, relying on the power of God's Spirit, to do whatever was asked of us.

So Mur and I contacted Doraine and told her we were interested in investigating the possibility of serving with FOF.

Doraine invited us to meet with her brother, Jim and herself. Jim was the founder of Grand Valley Fortifiers in Cambridge, Ontario and Doraine had served as a nurse in Zambia for 34 years and now retired, was serving as FOF's secretary (she also works as a recruiter for SIM). I wish I could say we were excited but we were not. If you have been following our story, you know of the difficulties we had in finding an agency to serve with. So we found ourselves on a dark wintry night, in late January, driving to a meeting wondering if this would be another disappointment.

We had no idea of what God was about to do...

The meeting was a wonderful time of Jim and Doraine sharing about the work of FOF. And as Mur and I shared about our family's dream and journey there was a sense that hope was emerging like the leaves budding out after a long winter. By the end of our time together Jim told us that he felt there was, "A lot of fit," even without us having a background in agriculture.

Doraine decided that it was time for us to meet with Ian (FOF Canada's chair), George (a farmer and board member) and herself. Mur and I left so encouraged!

As we waited for this meeting in mid February, we began sharing the work of FOF with our kids (they have a great website with wonderful videos that you can check out at http://www.fofocanada.com/) .

The excitement continued to grow. And we began to dream of what it would be like to serve with FOF.

The meeting with Ian, George and Doraine went well. They shared their experiences of being in Africa with FOF for short-term missions. It was good to have George, a farmer, there to ask about our lack of agricultural experience. Like Chester, George felt that there where many who could mentor us. And as we shared it became apparent that there was, "a lot of fit" with our experiences in business, ministry and youth.

At the end of the meeting, I turned to Ian and asked what the next steps were. I was surprised by Ian's answer; "I have no idea." I remember thinking that here I was talking with a successful CEO and he didn't know what the next steps were?! Then Ian explained that FOF Canada had never sent anyone over to serve with Faith and there were no processes in place to prepare us to go. We would be the first to be sent from Canada.

Amazing...So Mur and I began to explain how we had already been trained by Mark through the PAOC-MTM program. Only the Lord knew that this need for training existed. So we agreed to put Ian in contact with Mark and let Mark share our evaluation and training with Ian. And all of this needed to happen before FOF's schedule board meeting in 2 weeks.

Mur and I left this meeting flying! It had been 3 years since I received my first invitation from Harold to serve as chaplain with the AIA team serving in Lusaka, Zambia. And here we were after years of planning watching as the Lord continued to direct our steps (Proverbs 16:9).

Now at this point in our story you would forgive us if we were just settling to serve with FOF because nothing else had worked out. But as the weeks passed and we learned more of Faith and FOF we began to realize that FOF was a perfect fit.

After my trip to Zambia, I had two "secret" desires that only Mur knew about (well OK the Lord did too). They were: 1. Wanting to serve with a Zambian national mission agency (I wasn't against serving with a Canadian or US agency but had met a Zambian woman who was running an orphanage in Lusaka and felt it would be a great opportunity to serve with and learn from a Zambian), and; 2. Wanting to live in the same community with our Zambian sisters and brothers we would be serving with.

Additionally, one other desire had emerged during our training. Mark had challenged us with the idea of going to Zambia as learners. He taught us the difference between relief and development. I was introduced to the "Chalmers Centre of Economic Development" (you can check them out at: http://www.chalmers.org/) that began to help us better understand the importance of having a development world-view.

Again we learned that FOF was doing development work in serving alongside the 3,900 children, their caregivers and their communities. Instead of building orphanages (nothing against the many dedicated people who are meeting the overwhelming needs of children through orphanages) FOF works in the communities (villages) using a home-based-care model.

It looks something like this. FOF goes into a community and looks for the care givers - usually a grandmother or an older sibling (child-headed home). They encourage the care giver by recognizing their gifts, resources, resourcefulness, and commitment to the children under their care. They then ask these caregivers what needs they are having difficulty meeting. Then they work with the caregiver in helping to supply their needs (school fees, clothing, blankets food, etc.)

Then FOF's implementers (volunteers who live in the village and act as a community social worker/spiritual advisor) work with these families and others in the community, teaching agriculture (Farming God's Way/Foundations in Farming), HIV/AIDS awareness, the Good News of the Kingdom and whatever else the community needs. And because they live in the community they are able to model these things and encourage their neighbours to follow through.

So as Winter was ending and the hope of Spring was in the air we were beginning to realize that the Lord had been directing our steps all along our twisted journey (do I hear you singing the Beatles, "The Long and Winding Road?").

Indeed he had as he led us to FOF who was that "perfect fit."

Continued in Part 13: Faith Comes to Canada

Lessons Along The Way: Part 11

The winter of 2010 was a time of renovating, dealing with some escalating behaviour with one of our kids and waiting to hear from Doraine, the secretary of Faith's Orphan Fund (FOF). It was also a time of reflecting on our journey of the past few years.

I don't know if you are like us (maybe it's a Windsor thing or maybe a cultural thing) but many times we focused on the end (getting to Zambia) more than the journey. We understand now that the Lord needed to prepare us in ways we clearly did not understand.

So as we had more time to reflect we began to understand that one thing had and two emerging things would continue to impact our lives and prepare us for our time in Zambia. They were: The "Sign;" The Kid, and; The Group. Let me try to explain.

The "Sign." We live in a very small town, about 1200-1400 people about 10 minutes outside a twin city of about 400,000 people. There is not a lot of obvious problems in our town. People are basically friendly and helpful. Even the 4 churches get along! We have lived here for about 22 years.

Now here's the issue: Whenever I think about helping folks I think of the needs in the city - especially in the city's core. This is skewed by my experience - I was the Director of a drop-in centre for people on the streets, mostly "at-risk" kids. Consequently, I was unable to "see" the real needs of my neighbours.

Then one Sunday morning I heard a friend, who spends a lot of time in Africa, say this during his sermon: "People tell me it must be hard serving in Africa, but the truth is going to Africa is easy, it's going to my neighbours that is hard." I didn't hear anything else that morning. The conviction was so real. It was like scales fell off my eyes and I could "see" for the very first time. I knew exactly what the Lord wanted me to do.

No one knew, except for Mur (my wife) that I had a sense (for a long time) that the Lord wanted us to open our house for those who needed some comfort, some support. But I never did. But after this sermon I talked with Mur and immediately made plans to open our house as a community "House of Comfort."

So we put this sign near our front door (I thought it was kind of crazy at the time!) and guess what happened? Within a couple of weeks, a neighbour who we did not know had been suffering from terrible migraines and years of clinical depression (3 hospital stays in the crisis ward that year), began to connect with our family. And slowly we have seen (and continue to see) a remarkable recovery (no hospital stays this year, reconciliation with family members that seemed impossible just months ago) as she experiences God's tangible love...

The Kid. This was a season of some of the most difficult fostering we had done in a number of years. Escalating anger and temper tantrums (one Saturday from 9:00 am until bedtime), destroying anything in range when angry (car doors, dressers, AC units), throwing things, stealing and running away. This behaviour was happening at home, at school and at visits.

I can't tell you the number of meetings we had with specialists and teachers; The number of prayers; The frustration and the tears. On a number of occasions we wondered if we would be able to take our child to Zambia (and on some occasions we wondered if we wanted to take him!).

But through it all we learned to love more and hold on. We learned, again and again, the importance of holding on one day, one moment at a time. We learned the importance of faith, hope and love. We learned how to rely on the Holy Spirit to give us the love, strength and wisdom we needed in every situation.


And we learned the importance of offering those who are broken, through no fault of their own, a place to be loved and to belong (Mur and I wish it was easier for our kids and us sometimes). And time and time again we experienced the Christ that gave his life to heal our brokenness and holds us tight...


The Group. Mur and I have had some great small group experiences, especially as new Christians. But like many we allowed our busy lives to reduce our Christian experience to attending church on Sunday mornings. Don't get me wrong, we attend a church that has some of the best worship and preaching around, but slowly church became something we attended, not something we were.


One day, our youth pastor, Andrew, gave me the book, "The Tangible Kingdom," by Hugh Halter and Matt Smay. It was a tough read. Not tough because it was difficult to understand, but tough because it exposed my hypocrisy. Almost everything I read, I believed. I had to face the fact that I had allowed complacency to rob me of the Christian life I knew I needed to live.


Then, surprisingly, I received a call from a couple from our church who were on the same journey. They wondered about starting a group that would seek to live like the followers of Jesus have throughout the centuries - as the church living in community.


So we gathered some like-minded people and began a group following the "TK Primer." The group continues to this day. Each week we are learning to live more intentionally, missionally and incarnationally as family (a lot of big concepts that you can read about in the TK books).


So our family is learning that our journey is filled with essential lessons along the way that the Lord is using to prepare us to fulfill his dream in us; to live and serve the "least of these" here at home and in Zambia.


Continued in Part 12: A Perfect Fit?

The Sun Is Always Shining On the Other Side Of The Clouds: Part 10

Danny Brooks on his CD "Soulsville," sings a wonderful song, "On The Other Side Of The Clouds." Danny reminds his listeners that even though things can many times look dark and hopeless that we need to "see" beyond the clouds that too often hide the light. And even though many times we cannot see the Lord working, he is indeed present and his light, though sometimes hidden, is never diminished by the storms of life.

And it was this understanding that continued to keep us pursuing our family's dream, even though once again things did not work out with "Hands" (see blog #9). Winter 2010-2011 was a busy time. Renovations on the house continued. I (Brian) enjoyed being a part of the teaching team at our church (I love sharing God's word). This was also a time of emerging issues with one of our kids.

It's hard to explain how difficult this time was for our child and for us as a family, as anger increased in such a measure that we began to doubt that he would be able to come to Zambia with us. It was during this time that running away from home and school started (one time it took 5 hours and 20 police to help find our child!). Also physical threats to adults increased, making this a difficult time for all.

Mur and I will always be thankful for the support of family, friends, FACS workers, children specialists, our pastors and prayer as we tried to find solutions. We are also thankful for the Holy Spirit's strength and ability to continue loving through it all.

By late winter we knew that 2 of the 3 remaining mission agencies showed little interest in having us serve with them. And we had not heard from the last agency. But for whatever reason, Mur and I decided to be patient. Maybe it was because of the way we found out about this agency.

Before Christmas our son-in-law, Ulli, was speaking to a person about publishing a book about his life. Somehow the conversation turned to Africa. Ulli spoke about our plans to go to serve in Zambia. This person spoke about his sister,Doraine, who had served 34 years as a nurse at a mission hospital in Zambia. She was now working as the secretary for Faith's Orphan Fund (FOF).

Ulli phoned and excitedly encouraged us to contact FOF. Mur did this but discovered that Doraine was leaving for a couple of months. They agreed to talk when she returned.

This gave us time to begin to find out more about FOF. And the more we learned about Faith (FOF's founder) and FOF (see http://www.fofcanada.com/ for more information) the more we realized that FOF would be a good fit for us. Surprisingly, FOF's ministry to about 3,900 orphans in Zambia, was very similar to "Hands" work based out of South Africa.

So as winter ended, we had a quiet hopefulness as the clouds seemed to open and a few brilliant sunbeams pierced the darkness...

Continued in Part 11: Lessons Along The Way

Hope Fades Fast: Part 9

It was now 4 years since I had been at the Promise Keeper's conference where this God-dream (or so we thought) was awakened. Looking back we were pretty naive. We thought that when we decided to serve in Zambia, that there might be some "bumps" along the way, but nothing like we experienced.

If you've been reading some of our previous blogs you know that entering the Fall of 2010 was a low point for us. With no agency to serve with, all we could do was to try to figure out what was happening with Mur's heart, finish our mission's training, look for another agency to serve with and continue to work on the house renovations.

Our kids were wonderful during this time. The kept praying. They kept believing. They continued to be excited about going to Zambia. Maybe this is why Jesus said that we need the faith of a child to enter into His Kingdom. I wish I could say the same thing about Mur and myself. We tried to remain hopeful...

At the time, Mur was our biggest concern. Her heart was only functioning at 50% (no wonder she was always exhausted!) It appeared that her newly diagnosed heart problem might prevent us from going to Zambia. But by the grace of God, our doctor was able to get Mur into see a cardiologists quickly (difficult in this area).

Here we learned that her enlarged heart was due to a virus (we didn't know this was possible). We were told that it would probably take a year but with proper care she should regain 90 - 95% heart function. This was great news. And over the next weeks we began to realize that if we had been in Zambia, as planned, Mur's heart problem would have been cause to return home. Again, we did not understand the reason for the delays but the Lord did.

You may also recall that our oldest foster child had turned 18 and graduated from care. This meant the her support per diems had ceased. This wasn't an issue for us. She had come to live with us when she was 6 and she was like any other daughter that would live with us until she wanted to live independently. But it did mean that we would now have to raise the money for her expenses while in Zambia.

Then one day we got a call regarding our daughter from Extend-A-Family (EAF). We had heard about EAF but had no idea of what they did or why they wanted to meet. We learned that EAF provides foster homes for adults with developmental disabilities. And they wanted to know if we would consider becoming an EAF foster home.

This arrangement would provide her with financial support (similar to foster care per diems) and the community support she will need now and in the future. Additionally, Terral, her worker, has been a tireless supporter of our family dream to serve in Zambia. Again had we been in Zambia, none of these arrangements would have been possible. We were learning that delays for us (as frustrating as they are!) were opportunities for the Lord to direct our steps.

It was becoming apparent that in order to complete the house renovations that I would need some help. But we did not have the money to hire anyone. Then one day Mur realized that the son of a good friend was wanting to make some changes in his life. I suggested that if he was interested I would take him on as an "apprentice," pay him a stipend and bank the rest until the house was sold. He agreed. Dalton was another answer to prayer.

As this was happening, we began the search for some agency to serve with. Our trainer, Mark (PAOC-MTM program), suggested that we investigate serving with "Hands at Work" based in South Africa. as winter approached we contacted 3 additional agencies.

Then in Late October, 14 months after we had made our proposal to FACS we received word that the Zambian Department of Social Welfare had agreed to supervise our foster kids while we served in Zambia! Party time in the Windsor house that night...

Things starting falling into place with "Hands." Their founder, George Snyman, just happened to be in the area speaking, and made time to visit us in our home. It was a wonderful time learning about their work with about 14,000 orphans. It was a time of real encouragement. But there was one issue. Training was in South Africa and they would not guarantee that we could serve in Zambia.

We wanted to serve with "Hands." They reflected many of the values we had learned during our year of training. George was an inspirational and humble leader. Our hopes were high. But as our training came to an end we received word that it would not work with "Hands" due to our having to serve in Zambia...

So, again, in an instant, like a helium balloon that was soaring one minute and then spinning out of control as air escaped quickly, hope faded fast...

Continued in part 10: The Sun Is Always Shining On the Other Side Of The Clouds